I'm thinking when I'm asleep.

1. 5
   Dec
   

   "

   I’m lonely. I’m miserable, and I’ve been this way for a long time. I may laugh aloud over some lame joke, but that’s just me convincing myself to be happy and just laugh. In reality, only a few things really gives me joy. These are things that does not even exist in my life, things that are intangible, like musicians and celebrities, people that I only saw on TV. They talk about their lives, and I care about what they’re saying even if they don’t even have any hint I exist. And worse is that I can’t even laugh whenever I find them funny. Maybe it’s my fault that mostly late night TV shows, that I watch alone while others are sleeping, make me laugh. I never intent to disturb their sleep. It’s just me entertaining and motivating myself so I could work with all my plates and schoolwork.

   I can’t even laugh.
   I’m not allowed to laugh.

   "

   - - Rafonzel

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